Yesterday, I had a talk with Jenni. Luckily, she happened to be in her office and graciously agreed to chat.
I wanted to try the conceptual analysis approach-to use examples of my personal connections that I perceive as “model,” “borderline,” and “contrary” (Krathwohl, 1993), and weave found research with my personal narrative. Trouble is, as I keep reading literature, I realize how expansive the body of knowledge is on the topic of interpersonal connections, and how little I know about any of it. I started out with connectedness, then it morphed into closeness, then I had the urge to define “attachment” as a precursor to relationships, and so forth. I became confused and exhausted. I ran to Jenni’s office nearly in tears. Then she offered advice: just write your personal narrative, pages, and pages of it. “I cannot publish “pages and pages” in a journal… can I?” I said then Jenni suggested I trust the process–I will know how and what to distill when the time comes.
I will do just that.
Funny, I feel like writing my personal narratives is somehow cheating–I feel almost guilty calling it “academic writing.” Such is the birth pain of an emerging qualitative researcher, I suppose.